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Stories | #HowToNotBehave: Christmas Party

#HowToNotBehave: Office Christmas Party

You want to receive lots of attention at work? Here’s the perfect (wrong) way to get it.

The Christmas Party is coming up…this is the perfect occasion to put yourself in the limelight. With our top tips you’ll manage the transformation from swimming in the masses towards shining like a star (or something along those lines):


1. Dress To Impress.

Sexy, sexy, sexy. To stand out it can´t be short and conspicuous enough. Combine miniskirt with deep neckline – if you’ve got it flaunt it – oh and how about some fishnets, they’re sooo appropriate! This also applies for men: less is more. Maybe a tie is enough as top. It´s also easier to seduce your colleagues. Looking hot, hot, hot!

2. Drink A Lot.

First you need to get really drunk, really quickly. Order lots of shots. Your colleagues don´t want to drink with you? No worries, drink it all alone…cos that looks dead cool, yeah! Afterwards dance on the tables and splash everyone with champagne…that’s topic no. 1 created for your colleagues the day after.

3. Confront Colleagues With Conflicts.

It´s well known, that you are more creative if you´re drunk. So take the opportunity and trash talk your opponents with brilliant arguments. You´re at least one shot ahead.

4. Body Contact And Intimacy.

Especially when in conversation with your boss, remember the importance of body contact, oh and stories about your private life. He will definitely love hearing about your favourite amorous escapades from last weekend.

5. Leave Early.

And of course not alone. You have to consider that by this stage everyone is watching you and will see who you´re leaving with. That should guaranty prime conversation topics after the Christmas party, and ensure that the conversation at the party after your goodbye will never run dry. Whoop, mission complete!

If you adhere to our guide correctly nothing will get in the way of your ‘stand out’ moment! And if you hate your job, you may even get sacked…bonus!

Too much irony? Calm down with our November Playlist.